Anyone who is working to overcome an addiction should be aware that it can be a daily struggle. The longer you’re sober, the easier it will become. However, you need to make sure you have the right influences around you. A relationship can have a huge impact on your sobriety. In order to help ensure your continued success, you should look into finding a sober romance.
Why Sober Romances?
A sober romance for someone in recovery is advised because they need to be around sober people in order to make the most of their sobriety. Those who drink or do drugs aren’t necessarily going to force sober people into using again, but they can be an unwitting influence. With a romantic relationship, it’s crucial that you are with someone who you trust and who can treat you well. If there’s the divide between sobriety and substance use (or abuse), it can create a problem that won’t be remedied with any ease whatsoever. There needs to be a balance in a relationship between personalities, but sober people are best off being in relationships with those who are also sober.
How to Find Sober Romances
You can meet other sober people through recovery programs such as Alcoholics Anonymous or Narcotics Anonymous. These services shouldn’t be used for dating, but they’re great ways to forge connections, both romantic and platonic. You can also meet people through sober gatherings on websites such as Meetup.com. You can also use online dating and specifically request people who’re also sober. You should make sure to find similarities with people beyond sobriety as well.
When starting a sober romance, it’s important to be as honest with the other person as possible. Be clear about your experiences, not only with sobriety but also with dating as a whole. You might have painful memories that you don’t want to revisit, but you shouldn’t keep anything guarded. A relationship cannot survive if the people in it are afraid to be vulnerable and open with one another.
You should also make sure you have a connection that goes deeper than being sober. Mutual sobriety is sure to be an important part of your relationship, but it shouldn’t be the only thing. You should be able to converse with one another in a way that feels natural. You won’t connect on a romantic level with all other sober people you meet. This isn’t a bad thing, but you shouldn’t force something that isn’t meant to work out.
Dealing with problems
All relationships are bound to run into occasional troubles. With a sober relationship, you have the added difficulty of maintaining your own sobriety and caring for another person. It’s a balance that can be struck, but you have to be mindful of it. Clear communication must be stressed in order for your relationship to thrive. If you are feeling lost or frustrated about things, you should tell your partner as soon as possible.